How do you measure a man?

By Jo Anna Van Thuyne
Collegian Reporter
April 12, 2006

What exactly is it that measures a man? Would he walk on water? Would he run through fire? Or would he spike his hair and have little cute mouse ears? It takes a lot to turn this pop culture-hating girl into a swooning sing-a-longer. What could possibly turn me into a quivering 13-year-old again? Nothing but the angelic voice of the American Idol runner-up, Clay Aiken.

When people go through my iPod, they often find great musical vareity. One might come across a Pink Floyd album or two, all of Muse’s ultimate godlikeness, Eliot Smith, Eminem, Ours and Radiohead. People are often confused when they run across Clay Aiken’s Measure of a Man. “But, Jo Anna... Clay Aiken sucks. Why would you put him in here with all of this greatness?”

“Silence!” I tell them. Clay Aiken is an amazing talent with a voice that could make your own mother divorce your father and fall to his whim.

So what is it exactly that drew me to the dark side? Well, I guess you could first and foremost blame television. American Idol took the most talented (and untalented) youth of America and plastered them on a reality television show that would kick off or ultimately kill their career. The second season of the show is when I fell in love with Clay. There was a heated final competition, and Clay Aiken was robbed of the American Idol title by Ruben Studdard.

I was furious, devastated even. How could Ruben be victorious over the amazing voice of Clay? I think that the competition was rigged, but the joke is on Ruben Studdard now! Clay Aiken has sold millions of records, and has every 30 year old and older woman grabbing at his sexy, lanky body as he sings “The Way” at his concerts. Hey Studdard, what have you done lately? Nothing!

Once Clay came out with the single “Invisible,” I didn’t care how creepy the words “...if I were invisible, I could just watch you in your room,” sounded on the radio. His hypnotic voice sent me right to the record store to pick up Measure of a Man, and I’ve been cooing to it ever since.

I will continue to be moved by such awesome songs like “No More Sad Songs,” “This is the Night” and “I Survived You.” No matter what you think, Clay will always have a place in my heart, regardless of how much of a guilty pleasure he is.

vanthuynej1@lasalle.edu