Collegian craves Canadian kids’ chaos

By Drew Lazor
Collegian Editor
April 5, 2006

You know that TNT “We Know Drama” advertising campaign? Whatever ad wizards came up with that have obviously never seen Degrassi. Now in its fifth season, the oh-so-scandalous high school series returns to The N Network on Friday, April 7 at 8 p.m.

A quick distinction: the Degrassi we’re talking about here is actually subtitled The Next Generation. Degrassi Junior High, which aired in the late 1980s, was a spin-off of The Kids of Degrassi Street, the original gangsta of Canadian melodrama. The show’s set at Degrassi Community School, a highly diverse place where the students have more problems than post-payday Pete Doherty.

The list of issues Degrassi tackles reads like the appointment log at an overbooked guidance counselor’s office. We’re talking pedophilic Internet stalkers, inter-garage band love triangles, bipolar kids who get beaten by their drunken fathers and lurid acts of she’s-too-young depravity in the name of colored bracelets.

The overstated plotlines are decidedly issue-based, but they’re not as laughable or excruciating as your typical Lifetime fare. Also, no episodes star Kelly Martin, which is an automatic plus.

Here is a slightly fleshed-out synopsis of one particularly juicy two-episode plot arc that might help you understand this show’s utter absurdity. This kid named Rick, who’s an outcast of sorts, is involved with Terri, a sassy plus-size model. One day, they get into an argument, and Rick accidentally shoves his girl to the ground. Her head strikes a rock, and she slips into a coma (sidenote: she doesn’t appear on the show anymore, so as far as we know, she’s still in a coma).

All of Terri’s friends take it upon themselves to ostracize and ridicule Rick, especially Spinner, Degrassi’s resident bad-boy-with-a-heart-of-gold. After one particularly heated exchange, Spinner sabotages the school’s trivia competition, causing buckets of paint and feathers to fall all over Rick, Carrie-style. Although Spinner’s friend Jimmy, a rich, golden child-type star athlete, tried to call off the prank, his friend doesn’t listen. Rick somehow gets the impression that Jimmy was the mastermind behind his humiliation.

Naturally, Rick is embarrassed. So what does he do? Pick a fight with Spinner? Whine to Degrassi’s principal, Mr. Raditch? Nope: he brings a gun to school, shoots Jimmy in the spinal cord and then blows his own brains out. Rick’s dead, Jimmy’s permanently paralyzed and Spinner gets expelled and becomes an instant social pariah. And... breathe.

One of the most interesting aspects of the show is its commitment to lineage. The show grows with its characters; each year, they advance a grade, maturing or regressing accordingly.

Several of the actors who appeared on Degrassi Junior High are pivotal characters on The Next Generation as well – two of the most notable are Snake, the computer teacher with the abnormally large Adam’s apple, and used car salesman Joey, who looks pretty much the same as he did 20 years ago, except now he’s bald and wears a lot less denim.

The show’s quasi-serious nature is not completely free from controversy. American television actually banned the two-part episode “Accidents Can Happen,” where malcontented photographer Craig impregnates cheerleader Manny, the school tramp. Manny gets an abortion, and we all know how Middle America feels about that.

So, is Degrassi a reflection of the immoral squalor taking hold of children young enough to pay discount prices at Six Flags? Perhaps. But in all honesty, the show’s far too sensational and entertaining to be viewed as a teaching tool. Regardless, diehard fans and curious onlookers alike should tune into The N to witness the show’s fifth-season fireworks firsthand. Previews are hinting that Paige (who once did a college interview stoned) and Alex (who once beat up Snake’s stepdaughter Emma because she didn’t like her voice) are on the verge of becoming lesbians. Count it! According to the show’s tagline, Degrassi truly “goes there” – and you should too.

lazora1@lasalle.edu