Top 10 Lamest Cartoon Characters

By Nate Adams
Collegian Editor
January 30, 2008

Cartoons. I love ’em, even years after it is socially acceptable for me to like them. Still, nothing can sink a good cartoon faster than a lame character. Here’s one man’s list of 10 such characters, so wrectched that they threatened to ruin the good shows they appeared on.

10) Poochie from The Simpsons—This painfully hip character only lasted one episode before getting the ax from Itchy and Scratchy, and thank god for that. Any dog that's too cool for a trip to the fireworks factory is not the dog for me.

9) Rattrap from Beast Wars—For the life of me, I do not understand why so much time was spent focusing on this lame rodent transformer with a lousy New York accent when the clearly superior Rhinox and his badass machine guns were waiting in the wings.

8) Astro from The Jetsons—Call me a dog-hater if you must, but the first time my pup gets me stuck in my in-home treadmill that hangs precariously 100 feet in the air, I'm taking that mutt to the shelter and getting a hamster.

7) Connie from Doug—The only contribution Connie ever made on Doug was teaching me the term “big-boned.” Otherwise, this whiney non-character was a waste of screen time and my time. I’m glad Doug was able to get out of taking her to the Bumpkin Hoedown.

6) Snarf from Thundercats—Stupid catchphrase. Stupid, timid behavior. Stupid character. The only redeeming quality to Snarf is how hilarious he's being lampooned on South Park.

5) Nermal from Garfield—This "cute" little grey kitten got on my nerves as much as he did Garfields. Once, just once, I wish he actually got mailed to Adu Dhabi so he could get out of my TV watching life.

4) The Rugrats from The Rugrats—A lot of people really liked this show. A lot of people are idiots. Tommy and the gang never did anything for me. Their adventures were not cute. They were irritating. The only worse show that Nickelodian churned out was…

3) Twister from Rocket Power—Ah, Rocket Power. Far and away, the worst cartoon ever dreamed up by the Nicktoons department. And Twister take the high honor of being the worst character on the worst show in the history og cartoons. Congradulations, Twister, you Mountian Dew drinking mistake.

2) Kazoo from The Flintstones—It blows me away how all it took to demolish the finest cartoon in history was the addition of a smarmy green alien. I kept wishing that Fred would wake up, revealing it all to be a dream, so the normal pre-historic goodness could resume. Nothing doing.

1) Scrappy Doo from Scooby Doo—Famous, perhaps, for being unanimously considered to be the wost cartoon character of all time. I mean, Scooby Doo was no prize to begin with, but that it features the biggest waste of ink of all time drags a would-be cartoon into the dregs of animation. Eff you, Scrappy Doo.

adamsn1@lasalle.edu